My journey started off through a lot of trees till I came across a Bunker. I went in but there was nothing inside. “Boring” I thought to myself. So I continued to make my journey to the Southwest. That’s when I came across a huge bog. By the time I realized I was in a bog it was too late. I sunk into the mud and couldn’t move. I was just about to except my fate when I heard a sweet ladies voice. She said to me, “I will help you out but you have to help me in return. Will you help me?” I agreed to help and this weird looking old lady came out from behind a tree. She threw me a rope and managed to pull me out. After she got me out she told me to follow her. I did and we made our way out of the bog.
We arrived at this cleared area. It had a circle of rocks and what looked like a stone platform. As I took in my surrounding, the old lady grabbed my wrists and tied them together. That is when I realized what this place was. The old lady put me on the table. I asked, “what is going on?” “I am a witch and to regain my youth I must sacrifice a young boy” she said. It was a sacrificial altar. How could I have not realized that when I first saw it? I started pleading for my life but the witch was evil and only cared about the regaining her youth. I started to cry and that’s when the witch started to laugh. It was a horrible laugh that sounded like a donkey. She grabbed this rusty old knife and was walking towards me when my cousin Amanda tackled the witch.
Amanda got the knife and cut me free. We took off running towards the house. The witch was after us. She was about to catch us when this ogre jumped out and grabbed her. We never stopped running. We screamed all the way back to the house. We made it back to the house just as the sun was setting. My mom met us at the door because she heard our screaming and asked what was wrong. I told her the whole story and she started laughing and said we have a crazy imagination. She then hurried us inside because the birds were starting to show up around us. When we got inside I thanked my cousin for saving me and asked her how she found me. She said she arrived at the holiday house shortly after I set out on my adventure. My mom had told her that I went towards the Southwest and asked her to check on me. She said she made it to the bog and saw four sets of footprints and followed them. Then she found the altar as the witch was grabbing the knife. I have never been happier to see my cousin than in that moment.
Author’s Note: This story was based off of Tom Gauld’s Map of a Holiday in Hell. From this map I used these motifs: the Angry Birds, the Bunker, the Haunted Castle, the Bog, the Sacrificial Altar, the Ogre, and the Witch. I used these motifs because I knew if I let my imagination wonder I could come up with a good story. In this story I wanted to create an adventure of a boy that is walking through the woods looking to come across something fun. Instead he has two scary life changing moments. Then as he tries to tell his mom what happened she blamed it on his imagination. Like most adults when a child tells a crazy story. I didn’t have anything to really base my story on in the beginning but as I started writing I started to picture some parts of the cartoon Scooby Doo. Though I have never seen an episode that is anything like this, the monsters and ideas behind the cartoon helped my mind wonder. I wrote this story last semester. It was the first of my many crazy stories I came up with. I hope you like it.
Map of a Holiday in Hell, by Tom Gauld
Web Source: MAP
Ha ha, Colton, you had me hooked with "the angry birds come around after dark" ... what a great way to get things started! You also did such a great job of leading us along step by step... into the bog, out of the bog, and on to the next adventure! And I loved when the ogre grabbed the witch, ha ha. Ogres DO come in handy sometimes. But I am glad you got back safely inside before the angry birds came out... I bet even the ogres have to hurry on back home before the angry birds come out. You made really good use of this map for the storytelling... it would be cool if there were a whole book of maps like this to use for making up stories! There's no plot you can find on the map, of course, which makes all the stories so different even when they are based on the same map because all the plot comes from you (with some help from Scooby Doo). There are woods all around us where we live... but thank goodness: no angry birds. Or ogres.
ReplyDeleteGreat story! Like Laura I was hooked from the start! You did a great job pulling in your readers! I think you did a great job including many characters, I like them all. I loved the sense of adventure with your story, I was a lot of fun and I am glad I was able to read it!
ReplyDeleteGood Job!
I enjoyed your story. It was creative and exciting. Your incorporation of the map landmarks was great. You had some good descriptions, also, like the witch’s laugh sounding like a donkey and how the cousin followed the tracks. The ogre was also a surprise that was a great addition to the story. Overall it was a fun story that was developed well from the map.
ReplyDeleteColton, I'm glad to see that you went the extra mile to connect the inhabitants and/or places on the map. For example, you were able to explain why the witch appears near the sacrificial alter without wasting words by detailing a backstory. As someone who prefers the implicit over the explicit, I appreciate that quality in your writing. Keep up the good work!
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